| hey ya'll... |
[Apr. 1st, 2011|03:06 am] |
been a while since i've logged onto this site, and i'm suddenly quite annoyed with all the ads, banners,"sign up for a FREE two-week trial of a LJ Paid Account!" etc of livejournal. i don't think it helps that i'm super duper hungry right now after perusing morselsoflife.blogspot.com/ for the past hour determined and ready to make all of the chinese foods listed there. the stuff is amazing.
in short, i was thinking of moving things to a tumblr site, specifically HERE
as you can see, the name has no relation to anything at all, i was just trying to come up with SOME unclaimed name so i could start following other friends using the graphics-friendly site.
probably the same type of entries you have found here.... mental throwup in complete lowercase except when adding emphasis. |
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[Mar. 8th, 2011|12:31 am] |
well, the training for the 5k rugged maniac is going pretty good so far. no waistline results yet, but i did manage to run 2 miles nonstop on the treadmill without feeling the need to spend twice that amount of time recovering on the toilet with my head in between my knees. it's sad to hear but it happens more often than not. i've heard that it is a result of lactic acid buildup from running at too fast of a pace. i'm doing the Couch-to-5k training schedule but instead of 9 weeks, i only had about 4-5 weeks, so i jumped right in at week 5. hence the two miles today. which is probably the third time ever that i've run that far nonstop. even if it's just on a treadmill.
at the same time, i'm starting to wonder if i should throw some crosstraining in by attending some spinning classes. in preparation for that 42 mile nyc ride in may. should be good fun but my other friends have already started talking about the "pirate's code" or something like that, where if you fall back, you get left behind. thank goodness my bike's wheels are a smidgen larger in radius than a normal roadbike, so i have to pedal less to cover the same distance! oh, i should go and give it a tuneup shouldn't i. it's feeling quite nice to be active again.
this past weekend, a couple friends had a joint mardi gras themed birthday party. beer never appeals to me but it certainly does to everyone else. it's quite interesting to hear people's comments and conversations when they're completely gone. makes them talk more freely than they would otherwise and speak what's on their mind. well, a little bit about this group of friends. they've all suddenly went and gotten married last year. and those who haven't gotten married are already in pretty serious relationships, except three people. me and two other guys. i am the sole, single female and apparently, i've discovered quite recently, the talk and speculation of the married folk. they either think i had been dating this one guy (for those who don't know me well) or thought i should. and now i can say they've also gone and asked me in their drunken state why i'm not dating the other guy. really??? yes really! then another married friend sees me talking to this random guy i just met and whispers quite loudly, "you should go out with him!" okokokok i'm going to just go out with every unmarried guy. sheesh. i wish they'd just leave me alone. i'm not actively looking to date any guys right now. got too much else to think about. |
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[Feb. 10th, 2011|11:32 pm] |
the reason why i wanted to succeed in switching to the everyman alternate sleep cycle (3 hours continuous sleep, then three 20 min naps throughout the day for a total of 4 hours of sleep per day) was because i wanted to pack more into my day. that and... i used to be so envious of the characters in the roswell book series where all they needed was 30 minutes of sleep each night.
seriously, there's too much i want to do, and currently too much of things i have to do that's preventing me from doing what i want. i have tv shows that need to be watched (yes, i know they can be easily remedied by chucking the tv in the dumpster), i have books i need to read (current recommends are 'the tipping point', 'redeeming love', 'game of thrones', 'the pillars of the earth' with that last one being self recommended after watching the mini-series), i have chinese to relearn, and i have people i need to call to catch back up with. there just isn't enough time in the day to do all of this!! i wish i could cram my 8 hours a day of work into 4 hours of super efficiency but unfortunately i am not a prescription drug abuser and i don't concentrate very well.
similarly, i have this constant urge to want to experience everything. it's quite costly. i just signed up to do this 42 mile bike ride through nyc that happens may 1st. it goes through all five boroughs. they encourage photography, so it won't be a race to the finish type thing, which is good because i would die. then, i finally got connected with people who do dragon boat racing in dc every may. i've wanted to do that since i first heard about it back when i was in high school. so i'm determined to do that too. then there's a spring league for soccer that i'll be signing up for since i liked playing it last fall. i want to use power tools and hammer nails and paint so i've been helping out with a theatre group based in arlington. now that set design is over and the play is performing, i've found myself as a backstage crew wearing all black and doing scene changes. the next play they're going to be prepping for will be 42nd street. so i guess i'll probably help out with that one too.
and then there's the less local stuff, like people planning trips to colorado for snowboarding, or belize for scuba diving, trips my parents want me to go on with them, and the trips i want to go on to visit friends in other parts of the states. i want to do it all. but i can't. and it's frustrating. i need more time and definitely more money. and i need to invent a device that'll dispense hay, pellets and water for a week to a little furry white blue-eyed ball and chain. |
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[Feb. 4th, 2011|01:55 am] |
i'm too chicken to write it in the more public blog. so i'll reveal it here.
lately seeing people's facebook statuses change from "in a relationship with" into "engaged to" or seeing pictures of formal or informal engagment photos is making me a little sick to my stomach. i guess a less strong description of it is that it is making me a little queasy. not for the couples themselves, but for me. it's not them, it's me. just the thought of having to spend a long time with one person makes me feel queasy. i think i've gotten used to the whole "on my own" thing. i like the independence of being able to go somewhere because i have the precise time for it, or i'm financially able to. or i can be as active or inactive with my evenings as i want. is it strange? there was a time when i was considered joined to the hip with a friend. not just college, but almost my entire scholastic life. it was quite easy. i liked them a lot.
these days it seems more difficult to want to revert back to that. i feel like it's so much safer to hang out a lot with other girls, because though i do have a lot of guy friends now, i don't want to give anyone the wrong impression. not them, not friends, not my parents, not the waitress at the restaurant because i don't want anything more to happen. i've become very sensitive to that. i don't want people assuming anything at all. so then, i'm ok talking to guy friends all day online, but i try to limit hanging out with them to once every other week. with other girl gendered friends, people know nothing's going to happen, so it's safe to hang out all the time. but at this moment i don't have any girl friends in super close proximity to me to do that. i think i'm warping this topic, lets get back on track.
basically, at this point in life, my view of marriage and commitment or whatever is that it is a responsible, expected thing to do. if my parents didn't put on the pressure, then i could care less about it. i don't want to agree to tolerate someone else for the rest of my life. it might be childish and selfish but i don't really care?
i have cold feet about commitment and i'm not even in a relationship! shall we just pretend that no one tickles my fancy and that's the reason behind it all? or lets pretend that it's just the time of the month and a few days later i'll be back to my normal self. who knows.
grr... i wish to be around married friends who don't feel like just because they're married, they can take an interest in your life and wink and nudge you about any guy you might just happen to strike up a conversation with at a party. and i wish i worked somewhere else where you can just smile and say a friendly hello in the hallways without them thinking you're interested in them. and good golly, i wish things were back like they were in middle school where girls and boys could just be recess friends and marriage wasn't an expected thing like how college is an expected thing after finishing high school. good grief. |
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[Jan. 24th, 2011|12:13 am] |
i really like having two blogs. i didn't think about the benefits, but now that i've realized them, i'm really hoping to continue both of them.
i like it how for this blog, only close friends and... i suppose random strangers -who happen to search for random topics i write about- know about it, so i can be lax about what i write and how i write it. and lax about how late in the night i write about something, so much that i'm deliriously spewing out nonsense. a nice little outlet for any quirkiness that happens to plague me.
then for the other one it's for close friends, friends and acquaintances to read about topics that i happen to think are interesting. and i ponder about them the rest of the day, just waiting to find some time to get to a computer and write them down, so it gives me plenty of time to think about how exactly i want to present it. stretching out my right brain in hopes of improving my writing style despite not really improving my grammar. i'm trying really hard to be as neutral and objective to my observations as possible, rather than sometimes making passive-aggressive remarks about individuals in certain situations... like i reserve for this blog!
but then sometimes, like today for instance, i write in one blog and after that's done, i try to write in the other, and the tone of writing inadvertently carries into the other. i think i once learned in school that abraham lincoln never really had any formal speech writing training but instead spent all his time reading the bible and some other well written book, so when he sat down to write his famous speeches, that same great writing carried into his own. not to say my writing is in any way great, but right now i'm definitely not typing as gibberishly as i usually feel like i'm doing.
wait, does this mean that i'm trying to develop multiple personality disorder tendencies? |
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[Jan. 21st, 2011|01:47 am] |
i just spent an hour and 20 minutes facebook and xanga stalking someone. i know because at 12:01am, I thought to myself, 'i should go to bed soon'. then all of a sudden <BOOM> an hour and a half goes by. what the heckkk?!
i have been trying to go to bed earlier to wake up earlier to get into work earlier to try to get some work done before anyone else gets into the office. so far it has not happened. it is worrying because it is already going to be friday and that means next week i must cram in two weeks worth of work into four days. i will be taking friday off to drive up to philly for a weekend of good company and hopefully good food.
i could blame my lack of productivity this week on a number of factors:
1) burnt out from doing an excess of work for the past two biweeks for the purpose of reaching promotion eligibility and at the same time, getting off my 2 year probation (can you believe it has already been almost 2 years?!)
2) difficult cases
3) starting up the gym regimen again, this time during the middle of the day when it is least crowded with testosterone.
4) a barnacle of an individual constantly coming into my office and not taking the hint to leave despite my lack of involvement in any sort of conversation. it is difficult to work when someone is sitting there staring at you and waiting for you to talk to them. i am not amused.
i do not enjoy eating much cheese. i bought a thing of aged gouda from trader joe's because i was reminiscing of cheese i had in the netherlands back when i was 13ish and my taste must have changed because i cannot stomach much of it. it does not melt well on french bread either. i still have half a hunk left before the jan. 31st expiry date and i am wondering what to do. i think the only cheese i can really tolerate is mozzarella and two cubes of cheddar cheese. i went to this pizza place and ordered a slice of margherita pizza and they had shaped ricotta cheese into little balls and passed it off as fresh mozzarella. i was not amused at that either.
tommy likes to chew on things he can easily fit into his mouth. tv remote control buttons. aglets of shoelaces. the tops of retractable pens. the yellow caps attached to the zippers on my back pack. i woke up this morning to him gnawing on the little yellow caps, so i threw a "lonely planet: kenya" book at him. i am kidding. i rustled a box that was next to him and he ran under the bed because he knows he is not supposed to gnaw. he is cute and all, but sometimes i think about trying my hand at rabbit stew. will need a dutch oven first though?
it took too long to write all of these disjointed thoughts down. it is almost 2am again. i am writing without contractions because that is how jeff bridges talks in 'true grit' and i think it is funny. i think it also makes me sound like the autistic narrator in 'the curious incident of the dog in the night-time' which i did not think was a very satisfying read.
i want a burrito from cosmic cantina. steak. |
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[Jan. 19th, 2011|01:34 am] |
being at a predominately lacking social skills awkward male work place, and hanging out with a high male ratio crowd of friends, i forget what it's like to hang out with just girls. this past weekend i went over to a friend's place for an arts and crafts party and it was awesome. no crude humor, no talk of cars, no sports on the tv. instead, the afternoon was filled with dainty snacks and polite "omgosh, this is so good!" remarks, talking about which celebrity was in what movie, watching shrek 4 and valentine's day, and the like. i was so flabbergasted with the type and tone of the conversation, i was not my usual talkative self. merely observing the atmosphere and thinking, "ohhh i remember what this was like..."
i think i need to seek out more girl friends. i feel like this constant hanging out with guys thing is somewhat suffocating. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 23rd, 2010|11:23 pm] |
one of the things I do actually like about VA is the abundance of seven-elevens. they're EVERYWHERE. it's like the starbucks of nyc. one on every corner. the hot dogs are good. the slurpees are good. the gatorade is always 2 for 3 dollars. amaaaazing. it's the goto stop after soccer practice. love it.
that is all. |
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[Sep. 16th, 2010|12:29 am] |
so after the world cup, a few of my friends decided they wanted to join a soccer league and got almost everyone in the group to join in. we are officially "wait this isn't kickball?!" in the sunday morning casual league. did i want sunday? no. did i want morning? heeeck no. but here we are. the games haven't officially started yet, but we've been meeting up two times a week to just learn and have practice scrimmages. i think i've found my calling. soccer is sooooo much fun! i had no idea! i think it's really the one sport i never really touched. everything else... basketball, softball, tennis, golf, swimming, frisbee, lax... i've brushed up against at some point of time. it's really neat.
i got one of my friends from work (notice it does != coworker, because he really IS a friend, cool guy) to join in and he's like the fastest guy there. little speedy pants. really good too. since he doesn't really know anyone else aside from meeting them through this league, i've taken it upon myself to be near him just in case i feel like some 'bows need to be discreetly placed to even out the field. and i'm tailing him as best as i can and it's kinda neat cause then i get to see all of his footwork and moves up close and personal and 95% of the time i'm always, "oooh i gotta try that! oh wow! i gotta do that next time!" i do dearly love the footwork of soccer. and hey, it's like running too, but not thinking about it at all. it's all "ball!" in the same tonation as doug does when he shouts "squirrel!" in the movie 'up'. all i think about is how i gotta get the ball.
now this all might change once the real games start up and i'm aware of that but wow, i sure am excited at playing lots more of soccer! |
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| 'ello gov-na! |
[May. 7th, 2010|12:48 am] |
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i've been staying out late every night for the past couple of weeks, not because of working late hours, but because of hanging out with friends. i feel bad for getting back at midnight cause tommy's always gotta sit in his carrier until i come to let him out. i'm tempted to just let him have free reign of the room 24/7, but i don't want to have him mad at me one night and pee on my bed. drats. i knew i should've bought a higher unjumpable bed! but i love it most when he nudges his nose under my hand asking for head rubs. right now he's the sole benefactor of my long lost idea of becoming a masseuse. he repays me by licking my hand, and it's neat cause his little tongue is textured roughly, to help him groom his fur i guess. it reminds me of how cats and lions have barb-like buds on their tongues, to lick the meat off bones. makes me wonder if that's what the tongue buds really were for... and they evolved to be "taste" buds for humans, cause now we have loofahs to groom ourselves with. |
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